A Culture of Screaming

There has developed a culture of screaming in our home that in part contributed to my unacceptable outburst on Sunday.
I have tried over the past 5-6 years to really tone down how much I yell at the kids. I remember my wife commented when the kids were little that it was too much and that the kids shouldn't have to have me yelling at them all day. Even then it was my bad habit. Since then I have (I think successfully) managed to stay calm, be a calming influence in the home and to raise my voice only as a last resort.
My wife has been much more of a screamer over that period of time. Screaming is her main control method with the children. She says she can't cope and doesn't enjoy their company because they don't do as they're told for her. So she yells. And she screams. An the kids ignore her. Her screaming becomes background noise to them and they ignore it. So she screams louder. And to even less effect. The kids scream too. When they disagree or they're frustrated, their first reaction is to yell and scream. They're beginning to think that it's normal.
I haven't been immune, I have more and more frequently yelled and tried to get compliance in the screaming way. Especially with the stress of the recent weekend, Auskick, the birthday, the preparation for company, and the Mothers Day celebration - the kids got yelled at a lot in that lead up.
So there's a culture of screaming in our home.
The Sunday incident felt like it fit in to the culture of screaming. It was certainly a particularly stern growling but not completely foreign on the scale that we've become used to. Which is why I think I slipped into it so quickly and so seamlessly.
But to guest ears it must have sounded quite shocking. My screaming voice really sells the horror of the abuse, and so it must have seemed horrifying. Just horrifying.
This screaming culture must end.
I can control the part that I can control and that is me. I can re-double my efforts and be the calming dad I used to be. I can identify and deal with the lifestyle aspects which are making me angrier than before. I can set a better example to my kids about the right way to interact. The right way to act with the people you love most.
There's a plan.